You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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