3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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