We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
this beer tastes like vomit already
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize