I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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