have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
