He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Randomize