Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
