i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
