It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Randomize
