Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
