Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
