Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
