She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
