I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
