And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I pour the whiskey from now on
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize