My balls are so social today.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
