fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
