Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
