I hope mine doesn't look like that
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
