Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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