Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
My vagina just recognized that song.
Houston, we have a blender
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
