so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
