you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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