Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
