On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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