dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
