none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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