ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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