So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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