This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
