I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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