chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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