his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
