you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
