Walk of Shame. In a state park.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
