What a fucking waste of an outfit
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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