I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize