We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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