Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize