This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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