i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
