Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize