Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Don't tell me you're on acid again
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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