So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
