hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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