Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
