today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
i think my cat just said my name.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
