I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
