I saw his package. It spoke to me.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
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