I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
4 words: hood of his car
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
